the journey

And so I follow along the pages of these books, well aware of the perspectives I'm ingesting. I am now fond of ingesting the stories, the words, the legends and working them into life, creating a space for remembrance and honor. Benedicte, Handsome Lake, Mercer... the list continues to grow and I continue to accumulate stories to investigate. I've become my own librarian for my life and I am happy for it. One must learn to read books but also to build a relationship with them, to understand the stories and characters and how they affect you. How real is the character to you? Are you sympathizing with them? Are they becoming voices for you? It is important to understand within magick, myths and the mayhem of life that these things can be guiding... guiding to investigate more... perhaps a quick reference takes you on a different path or helps you uncover more about yourself and your personality.... you become an archeologist for you. Simply brush away some dirt and perhaps you find "more beyond". Don't be afraid to find those deep parts of personality that once seemed off limits.. you are the only one who can limit yourself.

day in the dark

Throughout most of my adult life I have been constantly drawn to the darkness. Reading more about my different muses I've realized I've invoked more in myself than just a dark personality. I have tried to take on these roles from deeper place and that has proved destructive. One because I never knew I was really doing it and two because I allowed it to take over. There is nothing wrong with feeling the dark, with seeing the dark or finding the beauty of the dark. There is however a responsibility because the dark has real consequences. It's like not respecting there are sharks in the oceans and just getting in their way on purpose. You can see where I am going with this. I, for one, will never get in the ocean. I always had a respect and fear of this great force on earth. Why I never respected the underworld or the darkness in a similar fashion is beyond me. It is okay to visit but to swim in it daily without using sense is entirely irresponsible. So i look back to my dark days with a sense of relief. I can now properly respect that space. I now have a sense of self and it is important to make that distinction.